Monday, April 19, 2010

We All Follow United! A Tiding Of Magpies

Right, dear blog reader, yer actual Keith Telly Topping shall say this but only once, because karma is, as we all know, a right sodding bitch. And gloating is so common.
When this blogger's favourite football team first entered the equivalent of what is, now, the English Premier League (it was called the First Division in those days), they looked like this. And Queen Victoria was still on the throne.
The last time this blogger's favourite football team was the, undisputed, 'finest team in all the land', they looked like this. And the Wright Brothers had only discovered the power of flight five years earlier.
The last time my favourite football team won the top league in English football, they looked like this. And yer actual Keith Telly Topping's dear old father was but eight years old.
The last time we won the FA Cup, we looked like this. And Anthony Eden was the Prime Minister.
The last time we won a trophy in a major European competition (and we're certainly not counting the Anglo-Italian Cup, much less the Intertoto Thing), we looked like this. And yer actual Keith Telly Topping just started infants school that year.
The last time we reached the final of the major domestic cup competition, we looked like this. And Slade were top of the charts in Britain.
The last time we won a league of any description we looked like this. And Doctor Who was a television show that the BBC used to make.
Now, we look like this. And we are the champions.
Yes, champions - by a distance, let it be noted - of a second tier, and desperately poor, division, I'll give you that. But, hey, just for one night, eh.

I shall look forward to seeing my beloved (though still, seemingly, unsellable) Magpies returning to places like Old Trafford, Stamford Bridge and the Emirates next year. And, getting twatted, of course. Trust me when I tell you, that's fine. I'll make a nice change from getting beat at Pride Park and Glanford Park, Scunthorpe.

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